Thursday, October 12, 2006

McDreamy Goes All McPunchy



See that photo? They're the very picture of idyllic on-screen happiness, right? Not so, it seems. Patrick Dempsey and whoever-that-other-guy is apparently got into a scrape because that other guy snipped at one of his fellow prima donna's for not being ready to act. Patrick Dempsey took that as a cue to jump in and flex his acting muscles by pretending to want to fight.

You can bet a lot of very large women are even more in love with Dempsey now.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

"I'm Not A Whore - Unless I Am"

Scarlett Johansson is sooooo transparent. I'm not promiscuous, she says and then goes on to explain how she wants to be.

So I will categorize her statements to make it easier for you. Here it is, the Celebrity Deathmatch you have been waiting for. Scarlett The Whore versus Scarlett Not The Whore:

"Josh is very sweet. He's a good boy."

Whore.

"Contrary to popular belief, I'm not promiscuous."

Not a whore.

"Yet I wouldn't say I'm a serial monogamist, either."

Whore.

"I mean, I went through periods of time when I was, ah, single."

Whore.

"But when I'm in a relationship, I'm in a relationship."

Not a whore.

"I do think on some basic level we are animals, and by instinct we kind of breed accordingly."

Whore.

"I work really hard when I'm in a relationship to make it work in a monogamous way."

Not a whore.

"I get tested for HIV twice a year."

Whore. Actually, there should be a triple-point square for that one but we'll let it go.

And the final result of the Scarlett The Whore versus Scarlett Not The Whore death match is:

Whore wins 5-3!!

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