"I'm Not A Whore - Unless I Am"
Scarlett Johansson is sooooo transparent. I'm not promiscuous, she says and then goes on to explain how she wants to be.
So I will categorize her statements to make it easier for you. Here it is, the Celebrity Deathmatch you have been waiting for. Scarlett The Whore versus Scarlett Not The Whore:
"Josh is very sweet. He's a good boy."
Whore.
"Contrary to popular belief, I'm not promiscuous."
Not a whore.
"Yet I wouldn't say I'm a serial monogamist, either."
Whore.
"I mean, I went through periods of time when I was, ah, single."
Whore.
"But when I'm in a relationship, I'm in a relationship."
Not a whore.
"I do think on some basic level we are animals, and by instinct we kind of breed accordingly."
Whore.
"I work really hard when I'm in a relationship to make it work in a monogamous way."
Not a whore.
"I get tested for HIV twice a year."
Whore. Actually, there should be a triple-point square for that one but we'll let it go.
And the final result of the Scarlett The Whore versus Scarlett Not The Whore death match is:
Whore wins 5-3!!
So I will categorize her statements to make it easier for you. Here it is, the Celebrity Deathmatch you have been waiting for. Scarlett The Whore versus Scarlett Not The Whore:
"Josh is very sweet. He's a good boy."
Whore.
"Contrary to popular belief, I'm not promiscuous."
Not a whore.
"Yet I wouldn't say I'm a serial monogamist, either."
Whore.
"I mean, I went through periods of time when I was, ah, single."
Whore.
"But when I'm in a relationship, I'm in a relationship."
Not a whore.
"I do think on some basic level we are animals, and by instinct we kind of breed accordingly."
Whore.
"I work really hard when I'm in a relationship to make it work in a monogamous way."
Not a whore.
"I get tested for HIV twice a year."
Whore. Actually, there should be a triple-point square for that one but we'll let it go.
And the final result of the Scarlett The Whore versus Scarlett Not The Whore death match is:
Whore wins 5-3!!
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